A Few Facebook Statuses and My Responses

My brother coined our type of humor as conversational comedy. We don't make jokes or write sketches, we just respond to things we hear and incite laughter. You dig? We are both able to come up with funny things from scratch, but many of our jokes are responses to something someone else said. And not all of it is insulting to the person who said it. Some is. But that's irrelevant. You're right, that is an elephant. If you don't watch the Marx Brothers let me invite you to begin doing so now. Well, here are a few Facebook statuses from the news feed today, with my responses.

This first status comes from my BFF, Muffin Man:

"I believe in pulling yourself up by your own bootstraps. I believe it is possible — I saw this guy do it once in Cirque du Soleil. It was magical"

Here is what I had to say about it (this status isn't from today, it was yesterday, I commented on it before work and then again after work):

"I believe that in so doing you will fall on your bottom and possibly sprain something. I cite the following as evidence: I once thought it would be a good idea to jump-kick two kickball's at the same time. I have two feet so I ought to be able to kick two things at once, right? I dropped the kickball's, jumped and attempted to kick them - I don't remember if I did or not as this was about the time I realized I was parallel to the ground in a cartoon style pause-in-mid-air-and-defy-gravity moment before I fell on my bottom and jammed both of my wrists in my bodies futile attempt to save itself. Both wrists hurt for about a month. All I'm saying is that unless you really are magical, as the Cirque du Soleil folks are, be careful about pulling yourself up by your own bootstraps.

"As I have had the day to think this over, I suppose that if you are able to exercise restraint and only pull one bootstrap up at a time you will be able to succeed. But watch where you put that boot after you pull it up. If you aren't careful you'll put it right back into whatever you are pulling it out of."

Here is status number two. I don't know the author, I only saw it on my news feed because Muffin Man liked it. The author's name follows the status:

"Has anyone else noticed that the Biggest Loser has a better track record of creating marriages than the Bachelor?" - D. M. Peters

And what I think about that:

It just goes to show you that money can't buy you love, and that looks are the most important thing in a relationship.

This is the time when I realize that what seemed like fodder for an interesting/humorous blog post really isn't. I will post one more status that I like, but I don't have anything to say about:

"You know it's probably time to turn on the heat when you can see your breath in the living room." - C. Sweet (one of my BFF's from days gone by, middle school to be exact)

All I have to say to that is that I agree.

This has been another failed/mediocre attempt at humor, brought to you by Ajax the Whimsical Revolutionary.

Happy Thanksgiving, Charlie Brown (and everyone else)!