Sleeping with the Pillows

You are most likely familiar with the Italian-American gangster stereotype. Perhaps you have seen any number of television programs or Hollywood movies depicting the mobber archetype. Having this familiarity allows me to present you with a comparison without needing further background information provided. I think that is nice because it makes it easier to tell a story. Here is my story.

A few days ago I woke up from sleeping all day, which isn't lazy of me because I work all night. Anyhow, I was telling my wife that I think I was still in heavy sleep debt. You see, if you don't sleep the appropriate amount of time for your body each night, you end up owing your body sleep. You go into debt the same as if you don't pay your bills. The debt adds up and can do some real damage to your health. It is important not to go into sleep debt.

What does this have to do with mobsters? Nothing. As I was depicting my lack of sleep in these terms I pictured the Sandman as a mobster whom I was indebted to. I owed him some sleep and I hadn't paid up. I thought it was funny, to picture the Sandman in a Fedora coming after me to break my knees because I hadn't gotten enough sleep. Apparently this is one of those things that is less funny several days later.

Also, I am realizing that I don't really have a story, and my explanation of how I didn't need to give background information in order to make the comparison I wanted to make in the story that wasn't much of a story became highly anticlimactic. And then there is that last sentence that is out of control! The point is, you don't want to cheat the Sandman; he knows where you live and he has the power to make you sleep. Which aspect of the imaginary character works to overturn my allusion even more.

Why would the man who goes around making people sleep get mad at you if you aren't sleeping enough? It's like your barber getting mad at you because you haven't been cutting your own hair. So if the Sandman wants me to sleep and I am in sleep debt, meaning I haven't been sleeping enough, then he'd come to my rescue, right? I think I was going about this thing all wrong. If we look at it like the Sandman is giving me something in return for sleep, meaning I pay him back by sleeping, and then I'm not sleeping, I suppose then my logic lines up and we could say I am in sleep debt to him. In which case if he were part of the mob he might break my legs. But then we need to discover what it is that he is giving me that should make me sleep, only I take it and then don't sleep.

I suppose "being awake" is what he gives me. That's really the only cause for sleep that I can think of. If we are awake, at some point we will be asleep. That's just how it works. Maybe the Sandman makes it possible for me to be awake. Maybe he gives me something called "being awake" and I take it from him, but then I don't sleep enough to pay him back for it. If this were the case then I most certainly would be in a condition of default and I would owe him.

I suppose the comparison works after all. All it took was transforming a lovable mythical fellow from a Hans Christian Anderson poem into some form of monster. A monster who wants people to get enough sleep? Well, that doesn't make sense either. What's so bad about being asleep? Nothing. I love it. In fact I ought to be asleep right now. I got off work an hour and a half ago and it is definitely time to sleep.